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In the face of trouble, married couples shouldn’t quickly choose to dissolve what they have. Instead, they must learn to face and resolve marriage conflicts.
50% of first marriages end in divorce, with 20% of enduring couples still experiencing marital distress.
Although there’s not enough data to show what this can be attributed to, it’s safe to conclude that the inability to resolve marriage conflicts is one cause. Even after years of being together, couples will still encounter arguments when their personalities and preferences mismatch.
This doesn’t mean they’re incompatible and should call the union quits, which can be the initial thought crossing their minds. Arguments, no matter how intense, don’t automatically signify they’re with the wrong person. Instead, it’s normal when two distinct individuals meet with only their love and commitment as common ground.
Years Down the Line, Marriages Can Still Be Troubled
Normal as they may be, conflicts don’t become painless.
In fact, these may even become more challenging for most couples to address and more distressing to resolve. After all, when they’re deeper into their relationships, couples don’t only squabble about where to eat. They argue about consequential matters that can permanently damage their union.
Like everything else, marriages have their ups and downs.
But unlike other unions, matrimony can’t be immediately let go.
When married couples feel their marriage is on the rocks, they can’t call it quits like it’s nothing. Not only are they releasing years of companionship down the line and starting anew, which can be a waste and regretful, but they may also face the wreckage of a family they’ve built. This is especially significant when the couples have children of their own.
Divorce, to most, should be out of the picture unless there are some severe repercussions attached if they stay together. An argument shouldn’t immediately lead to a separation.
This must be an ideology deeply engraved in marriages. However, numbers don’t lie, and regardless of how understandably valuable marriages are, divorce—peaceful or not—is still prevalent. Divorce rates constantly surging are but a testament to the path most couples take. Instead of sorting out problems, most go for the easier way out. They don’t attempt to resolve marriage conflicts but automatically find a means of relief through separation.
How Do You Fix a Marriage That Is Falling Apart?
The Love I Thought I Knew by Donald Marcus Welch tackles the challenges married couples face. It’s a testament to how normal it is to experience marital crisis and that this shouldn’t be taken as a signal to surrender the beautiful union they have. Instead, it’s a call for couples to try again and resolve the marriage conflicts they’re facing.
When the ground begins to shake, this doesn’t mean the foundation is frail. It’s a call for the couple to proactively strengthen and build each other up. It’s not for couples to realize they’re better off without each other. Instead, it’s when they must see how much better their union will be after the mess has been settled and how much closer they will become if they resolve marriage conflicts.
How Do You Handle and Resolve Marriage Conflicts?
When one is on the outside looking in, it can be pretty easy to give advice. As an audience, the problem is merely a secluded matter that needs to be discussed. They can’t perceive any underlying and unresolved trail of wreckage that may require more to be addressed.
Only the couples involved would understand how extremely daunting it is to resolve marriage conflicts. Only they would genuinely comprehend the significance and potency of their problems at hand.
The most common reason marriage fails is a lack of commitment, which can be shown in how couples manage and resolve marriage conflicts. Without the sheer determination to fix what has been broken, couples let go of what’s valuable to them. They fail to see the bigger picture and consider that every problem has a solution.
When hearts have been shattered, here are some steps couples should take to mend them.
Never Point Fingers
Arguments happen because of miscommunication or misunderstanding. Although only one side may have had a faulty judgment, pointing fingers is never acceptable.
To resolve marriage conflicts, couples should work as a team.
In fact, the moment they’ve become one in matrimony, they work as one body. It should be them against the problem, not them against each other. When couples resort to blaming, only time can tell when the union will be doomed. It’s like putting all the responsibility over for one to mull over and resolve. When the blame game happens, only one shoulder carries all the burden, which isn’t only unfair and taxing for that individual.
When couples desire to resolve marriage conflicts efficiently, they should work together. They must communicate and put in all their efforts to find a solution.
The point of marriage is finding someone people can rely on, a shoulder they can lean on to share their woes. Collaboration is among the key ingredients couples need to solve even the worst marriage problems. Without it, they’re better off alone than with someone else for an enduring marriage.
If you’re looking for ways to resolve marriage conflicts, purchase Donald Marcus Welch’s book for practical and effective advice on preserving lasting love.
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i really do believe that all marriages can be resolved if all parties just sat down and worked through everything.
this! it’s always a choice they have to make. talking about problems can be uncomfortable but this is so much better than hurting each other